Disclaimer: The stupid write-up below is fully based on my experience with anger and its resemblance to your experience (if you’ve had any) is purely coincidental. I’ve not used even a fraction of my brain while writing it. It’s all situational.
Anger is a reflex that we can’t control at times. It just comes and takes over your mind. Till the time it’s on you, it hampers your thoughts and affects your speech. At times, it leaves you speechless. I guess it’s quite a high level of anger that makes you speechless, makes you shiver, and blocks your mind. No, I’m not trying to write what anger is about. I’m trying to write my experience of it; a kind that happens rarely.
What are we supposed to do if we’re THAT angry? Count till 10? When you’re shivering with anger, would you even remember that you’re supposed to count till 10? Nope. Then what? Am I supposed to take long deep breaths? May be I’m already exhaling fiercely like an angry bull! My eyes, ears, and speech are blocked. My mind is too busy handling the shit that made me THAT angry and refuses to understand anything. I might not say anything or I might scream my lungs out. Isn’t it normal? Yes, it is.
Okay, I might call up a close friend and vent it all on him/her. I need someone who can listen to what I have to say. I need someone who can listen to me even when I’m not saying anything. Someone who can listen without interrupting me. Advising me about what to do, what I am supposed to, what I could have done, etc. is going to be useless at that point of time. That’s because my brain’s door is shut and nothing can enter.
Now, what if this person takes offense because I shouted in front of him on something which he doesn’t have a clue about and then thinks that I’m shouting on HIM? Ok, then you feel like tearing your hair too.
How on earth am I supposed to take it out? I can’t keep it inside. I can’t take long breaths, count till 10, or tell my brain to shut up and remain calm. Should you not just let me talk it out? Alright, read it as "scream it out"!
What if I break a thing or two? Can I? Plllleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaassssssssssssssseeeeeeee!